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Showing posts from June, 2006

Compassion for poor and suffering

Young Sikh Girl raises money for Canadian Red Cross Few children make a point of catching the latest edition of World Vision on television. For most kids, the dire circumstances of others their age living without food, water and shelter, and suffering the horrifying effects of AIDS, in the Third-World nations, don't register. But Japnaam Kaur isn't like other children. Since age four or five, she has asked her parents to choose channels that are playing World Vision when they sit down to watch TV. And once the program ends, she always says the same thing: " I want to help them ." With the help of her parents, her school and other children in her neighbourhood, the seven-year-old set up a lemonade stand and recently raised $290 for the Canadian Red Cross. "I wanted to raise money so that those children can have food, and so that not a lot of people will die from AIDS anymore," Japnaam said. But she never imagined that her little lemonade stand, al...

WAHEGURU!

The name of the Parm-Aatma “God” is proclaimed by Guru Nanak Dev ji as WAHEGURU. It is made up of three words – Wahe – wonderful, magnificent, superb, astonishing, fantastic, brilliant, great, breathtaking etc. etc. Gu – darkness, dusk, gloom, night, obscurity, absence of spiritual illumination i.e. spiritual ignorance Ru – light, spiritual illumination, enlightenment So altogether it means “Oh Wonderful God, you are the spiritual enlightener and dispeller of ignorance.

ABC of Parenting

A is for accountability. Hold your children accountable for their behaviour. B is for boundaries. Set specific limits and make clear what the repercussions will be if those limits are exceeded. C is for consistence. Hold to the same principles and practices. D is for discipline. Make the punishment fit the crime. Never discipline the anger. E is for example. Children are in greater need of models than critics. Set a good example. F is for forgiveness. Practice it and teach the importance of forgiving. G is for giving. Teach the joy of giving, not only to family and friends, but to strangers in need. H is for sense of humour. Keep your sense of humour. Promote laughter with your children. I is for imagination. Be creative and play with your children. Make up stories of songs when you read and sing with them. J is for joy. Let your kids know that they are a joy to be with. K is for knowing. Know your children’s friends and their parents as well as their te...

Meeting the beloved against all odds

fareedhaa galeeeae chikarr dhoor ghar naal piaarae naehu || chalaa th bhijai ka(n)balee rehaa(n) th thuttai naehu ||24|| bhijo sijo ka(n)balee aleh varaso maehu || jaae milaa thinaa sajanaa thutto naahee naehu ||25|| Fareed, the path is muddy, and the house of my Beloved is so far away. If I go out, my blanket will get soaked, but if I remain at home, then my heart will be broken. ||24|| My blanket is soaked, drenched with the downpour of the Lord's Rain. I am going out to meet my Friend, so that my heart will not be broken. ||25|| Bhai Sahib was reciting this shabad when I entered the Darbar this weekend. Freed Ji’s shabads have always touched my heart. Once I began to read on Freed Ji’s life and could not continue as after each line my eyes welled up with tears. I always thought that the ‘muddy path’ that Freed ji is referring to is the ‘Maya’ in the world, that keeps us from remembering God; but it is much deeper than that. It is the mud in our ears to listen to our own praise a...

Giving – an expression of love or ego?

Giving is our way of getting by in the world. Many of us think –“if I give; the others will like me. Better yet, they may even come to need me. Then I won't be so alone in the world.” G iving becomes a kind of haggle to belong; a proffer for love, rather than an expression of it. This kind of giving does not allow for egoism of any kind, and yet it is excessively egotistic. Selfishness is vigorous when one knows one’s limits, and sets those limits; meaning prioritizing self-care over caring for others. It insists that you express your feelings, even when it is inconvenient to others. It includes the ability to rest when tired, and to ask for what you want and need, when you want and need it. It is the healthy expression of power. By doing so, we identify the course we take, making it much easier for the blessings of life to come to us.

A Prayer for the Children…

(our school district prayer) We pray for the children who put chocolate fingers everywhere, who like to be tickled, who stomp in puddles and ruin their new pants, who sneak Popsicles before supper, who erase holes in math workbooks, who can never find their shoes. And we pray for those who stare at photographers from behind barbed wire, who’ve never squeaked across the floor in new sneakers, who never had crayons to count, who are born in places we wouldn’t be caught dead, who never go to the circus, who live in an X-rated world. We pray for children who bring us sticky kisses and fistfuls of dandelions, who sleep with the dog and bury goldfish, who give hugs in a hurry and forget their lunch money, who cover themselves with Band-Aids and sing off-key, who squeeze toothpaste all over the sink, who slurp their soup. And we pray for those who never get dessert, who watch their parents watch them die, who have no safe blanket to drag behind, who can’t find any bread to steal, who don’...

Journey back to HOME!

Most of the problems that today’s youth in western countries facing is due to the fact that their moms had very little time to spend with them. Parents of these teenagers; who are now in their 40’s & 50’s; migrated to these countries with golden dreams in their hearts but with absolutely nothing in their hands except their hard-earned professional degrees. They put them to good use by getting into professions. But how about the most noble profession called ‘mothering’. Most of the Sikh mothers, I know of, are working mothers. As much as they want to, they can’t afford to leave their jobs, their children spend 40-50 hours a week in child-care or with baby-sitters, who can’t replace a mother’s role in a child’s life. The cost of quitting is probably too high for those who are first generation abroad and do not want to be financial burden on their children in their old age. More than often, guilt - that insidious snake - likes to slither up the backs of such moms who want to be home...

A Sikh Freshman’s ‘must read’ for this Summer

It was a wonderful Saturday at IGS School just before we closed for summer; while children spent decorating pieces of quilt with their thoughts and ideas on “Why am I proud to be a Sikh?”; but it was not so pleasant for a Sikh mother who was all worried about her 14 year old son, who insisted that he wanted to wear ear rings along with heavy duty ‘kara’. My heart goes out to that mom as well as her not-so-young kid; it's not easy being 14 no matter where you live, or who your parents are! It is even more challenging when you are the ambassador of Sikh faith. Being 14 is a difficult transition from being a ‘boy’ to becoming a man; it is the time when kids feel that they must "fit in" with the crowd. Wearing earrings is a recent trend. In early sixties, Americans believed that it was practice of backward and uncultured people; but fashion has taken its toll; now all women; young or old, are seen wearing earrings. The size and design of the rings have no limits. The earrings...

Army of Shahid Singhs in 1984

source: tapoban.org by balpreet singh After the assassination of Indra Gandhi on October 31, 1984, Sikhs were butchered across India. I heard this true story about a Sikh couple living in an isolated village outside of Punjab. The couple was young and were amritdhari. The Singhni wore a dastaar and they had a young child. The Sikh couple had an isolated farmhouse in a Hindu dominated area. When news of the assassination reached the area, and it was found out that Sikhs were being killed, some local thugs also decided it was the perfect chance to loot the farmhouse. The Singh found out about these plans from some well wishers and told his wife that they had very little time and an attack was coming. The Singh said that they should leave their farm and escape to save their lives. The Singhnee however reminded him that they had done Parkash of Sri Guru Granth Sahib on the top floor of the house and how could they run away from Guru Sahib? The Singh again repeated that there ...

Loving Your Children While Leaning On Waheguru!

One cold Thursday afternoon, I rushed in the Child Care Centre after doing two hours of errands holding ~3 month old baby Harjap to pick up my two-year-old Sukhmani. "Your daughter pulled hair of one of the children," the teacher said, and gave me-and my little toddler-a disapproving stare, as if somehow perhaps I had something to do with this bad behavior, and that it would surely lead to a life of crime. "I am so sorry," I said, taking Sukhmani's little hand and gathering her diaper bag and jacket to leave. I felt terrible about her pulling that child's hair, but they'd already left so I couldn't apologize to his mom. This was my middle child. She was usually so good. Such a happy toddler that since she was born people in grocery stores often stopped us to say what a good baby she was! Neighbors were warmed by her smile. While this wasn't the only time one of my children exhibited less- than-perfect behavior, it did teach ...

Sewing: A lost dream

Lying at the bottom of my chest of drawers, hidden away from inquisitive husband and kids who just wouldn't understand, is a Kachhehra. Let me be truthful and rephrase that. There are pieces of a white cotton cloth. These various pieces look especially impressive, because I cut them out using a pair of those zig-zaggedly scissors that make you look like you know what you're doing. Unfortunately, my sewing expertise sputtered out soon after, as I started trying to decipher the inscrutable pattern directions; given by mom-in-law. Before I could intersect with the interfacing, I found I was unable to salvage the selvage. Spools spun off the top of the machine, needles broke, and the only thing I wanted to know about naps was when I could take one. Are you lost? Me, too. So I stuffed my $50 worth of material, laces and collection of my shiny buttons in that bottom drawer and headed for Wal-Mart to repalce my new love of sewing with old love of shopping. That was several years ago. ...

Thought for the Day!

To the keepers of children: "Remember you are awakening your child's divinity, not creating it. She has come to you as gift from God and is already very connected to God. You need not impose your ideas as much as nurture her relationship with God"

Sikhi Sidak

After Gangu Brahman, informed the officials at Morinda, of Mata Gujri Ji and Chhote Sahibjaade’s presence in his house, in hope of being rewarded by the government; we all know of the arrest of Sahibjaade ; sweet little talk by Wazir Khan, offering them riches and good positions when they grew up; all they were required to do was to become Musalman . The kids knew the difference between Islam and Sikhism, and like other Sikh children knew the history of their ancestors, who had sacrificed their lives, sticking to their own faith. They stubbornly refused, not bowing even under threats of death. F ailing to persuade or startle them, aggravated and exasperated Wazir Khan ordered that they be put to death. N awab Sher Muhammad Khan of Malerkotla, who had accompanied Wazir Khan from Chamkaur, interceded that the children were innocent, their lives be spared. Wazir Khan, slightly mellowed, agreed to give them one more day to think over, and talk to their grandmother. I nstead of asking, ...

Before we say 'YES'

Children often get invitations to B'day parties that include 'sleepover'. It was easy when they were young; we simply said "they are not ready yet"; but now they are 'begging' to be with friends; friends are pleading to let them be with them for one fun night. The question about 'sleepover' these days is not so much whether your child is ready, but are you and your entire family ready to deal with the consequences if you have misjudged the character of the stayover house parents. The "nicest" people can do the most terrible things - is a minor child able to extricate themselves from a damaging situation? Will they be able to tell you what has happened? You have to 100% know and trust the caregivers - and even then it's a risk. What do other Sikh parents think about it? I mean how do you know if it is okay to enturst someone with your child, who you never talk more than saying 'hi' in the parking lot of the school only? Just w...

Rise of Khalsa

Yesterday; this DVD arrived in mail; just in time, when children were complaining about their favorite after-school program not being relayed on TV ‘again’. As I flashed the package in air and announced that I have something better than that, it did not bring any smile back, though they had watched ‘ Sahibzadey : A Saga of Valor & Sacrifice ’ the first ever animated movie on Sikh history; by Vismaad , last year. In my disappointment I fixed the snacks and milk for them & quietly put the DVD on, pretending to be watching alone. That did the trick!...and they were practically glued to it till the end. Thanks to Annual Sikh Youth Symposium competitions by Sri Hemkunt Foundation, Inc. that educated them last year on ‘ R ise of misls’. Mughal ruler Aurangzeb died in 1707 AD. With that began the downfall of Mughal Empire. Aurangzeb’s son Bahadur Shah became the Emperor. On his way to negotiate peace with the Emperor; Sri Guru Gobind Singh ji stopped at Nanded to meet with Ma...